Shortening the road
When the Gobá® Saor, the master architect and builder of Irish folktale, was commissioned by the King of England to build the world's highest castle, he decided that his son should join him on the job. He told his wife that it was time that the lad learned a trade and, as well, two pairs of hands might be useful, he said, because once the castle had been built, the king might not be willing to allow him to walk out the door and build an even higher castle for a rival monarch. Such were kings back then.
So, one morning, father and son left their home in Kerry and started walking in the direction of England. After a few miles, the Gobá® said to his son, "Shorten the road!" Perplexed, the son asked him," What do you mean? I don't have any tools in my bag for cutting roads!"
With that, the Gobá® turned on his heel and started home. After the pair had returned, the mother took the son aside and asked why they had come back so suddenly, and the son recounted the incident with his father.
"Well, aren't you the terrible eejit, altogether," exclaimed the mother. "Sure, when he said, 'Shorten the road!', all he wanted you to do was tell him a story so that the time would pass quicker." For the remainder of the day she told him tales about "An Gadaí¢¬ the great thief who stole the King of Munster's favourite sheep.
So, father and son left the house early next morning and after a few miles, the Gobá® said to his son, "Shorten the road!", whereupon the young lad began to recount how "An Gadaí¢ learnt his trade by stealing his father's shoes. Before they knew it, they were on the outskirts of London.
Although the Rainy Day team has been on life's road for more than 20 years, it has not run out of stories yet and we've been shortening roads recently with ones which will be appearing here in the coming days. They all feature sex, but because they're true stories from the Ireland of our childhood, the sex always leads to grotesque tragedy.
Note: The Rainy Day team is travelling. However, Movable Type has been primed and the Rainy Day sister in Limerick is keeping the blog show going. This combination of nepotism and world-class nano-publishing system will ensure that the site is updated regularly.
Diarist of the day: Sir Alan Lascelles, 17 September 1907"A peaceful weekend, in which little of interest happened?Even if it weren't Harewood, it would always be a most comfortable house to stay in. There are four essentials to comfort — shaving-water that will stay hot for an hour, boot-jacks in every bedroom, grapes for breakfast, and Ruff's Guide to the Turf in the rear [lavatory]. Harewwood has them all except, oddly, the last."
