Eamonn Fitzgerald's Rainy Day

Did you know that in 1958 a home movie was secretly made of Pope Pius XII's dying moments and then offered for an exorbitant price to the media? The Vatican hired a private detective who traced the film back to the Pope's physician Dr Riccardo Galeazzi Lisi. The man paid for his greed with his career; he was struck off the doctors' register. Brushing up on our Holy See facts, we are. Here's another cinematic one: The papal election scene in The Shoes of the Fisherman (1968) with Anthony Quinn as pope had to be shot in a cardboard Sistine Chapel because the Vatican refused permission to film in situ.

Talking of the Sistine Chapel, it was once home to a magnificent Renaissance tapestry the size of a tennis court designed by Raphael and all luminous with gold thread. Part of a series of ten, which are currently undergoing restoration, this particular one formed the backdrop to 15th century Pope Leo X's orgies. "Since God has given us the papacy," he famously said, "let us enjoy it."

Despite the sexual, political and financial scandals that have beset it over the past 2,000 years, the Vatican persists and evolves. In our time, the Latinist department of the Curia, the Vatican's civil service, has had to find translations for "television" (imaginum transmission per electricas undas) and "domino theory" (tessera surrogata), and although John Paul II is seen as the great conservative pope, he is the first pontiff to wear a wrist watch and have satellite TV installed so that he could look at international football. If you would like to call the Vatican (+39 6 69 88 35 11) and pass on your best wishes for his health, you'll be greeted by "Pronto. Vaticano?" If you'd prefer to use e-mail, here's the address: john_paul_ii@vatican.va.